Wednesday, January 21, 2009

the 2nd Secret

I must admit that I am struggling keeping up with this book... not sure why. Maybe it is because I have been away or maybe, just maybe I am in panic that I may have to create. Me? Create? I am not an artist my ego tells me. Paint? yeah right. ..... but I desperately want to. I want to paint, I want to create gorgeous collages, I want to find inspiration, I want to make a captured fairy jar. I want to pot....... I am sure I can do all of this but I don't or won't make time.... instead I take time to work in my garden, or create my gorgeous home..... and I cannot, simply cannot take time to paint when my housework is not done. It is not in my make-up to do that. If I ignored the washing or cleaning, and went to create, then all I would do is stress and worry... so I need to find a solution here or else forever I will be a frustrated artist.

so many questions to ponder in this chapter..... when I get creative inspirations, if I don't get them down them down then and there they are gone. As quickly as they came. Problem is most of mine come at 3 in the morning and I usually cannot rouse myself out of that sleep fog to write them down.. at 3am they are as clear as a bell, I am certain that I will remember them & I promise myself that I will jot them down in the morning. But when I wake, try as I might.. I cannot remember.

I am passionate about my garden. It is my absolute passion. I lose myself while in the garden. I know I am creative there. It just happens without any effort from me.

I already have the materials... hell, I have enough for all of you!

but wait! there's more:

i collect stuff. have been for ever, I gather bits and I go and buy old books just to use the covers for art... but there they sit.. waiting, waiting for inspiration to come.... I have ideas for canvases in my head.. but the line between my head and my hands doesn't seem connected properly. Maybe there is a fuse gone wrong.. because it doesn't come out the way that I see it in my minds eye.

oh I already have the space...

I am blessed in that I do have plenty of me time and I do have Sacred Space of my own... actually two.
I have a room where I meditate, where I sometimes take a nap on the vintage cane settee, where I keep my self-help books, my crystals, oils and essences. This room is saturated with angelic presence. It is where I talk to spirit.

then i have my creative studio. where I dabble with ART, where I create my journal, make gifts, cut and paste. where I stare at a blank canvas and wish I could do something with it. But I am scared of making a mistake. This room looks out onto a side garden where peace flags flutter in the breeze.....


Kavindra said...

Oh sweet Robyn!
Those pictures made me laugh. I could take the same sort of picture if I was better with the digital camera.

I so hear you about being afraid of making a mistake. My thing I say it I don't want to waste art supplies on crap.

Maybe you and I should make a pact to each make the biggest stinkiest pile of absolute poo that we can with our art supplies. Just make anything and have fun seeing how bad it can be. The winner of the worst one gets a prize. I bet that'd be fun and free us up.

And as you know, you already are creative, in so many ways, you create beauty. It all counts! Your gifts to bring into this world are precious. Plus some of the artists you admire would probably kill your whole garden dead in a week.

On the other hand, you have the absolute right to play and experiment with new mediums besides your garden and your kitchen if they call you... which it sounds like they do. Take the plunge! If you will, so will I ;)

Anonymous said...

Robyn, what beautiful spaces you have created and have all you need for when the time is right.....

Can absolutely relate to the paralysis that overcomes when poised to make a mark... I walk away. Writing in my blog is my baby step forward.

I agree with Kavindra, I am one of the dead "gardener's" LOL... AND I would love to be able to create this landscape as YOU do. Creative fingers right at the end of your arms!!!

I am willing to join the plunge, let me know where the pool party is.. ::smile::

Winterwood said...

I too have those 3am writing moments and write fantastic poems but dont write them down, only for mind to be totally unable to recall them in the! love your creative spaces.... they look like the right spot to 'do creative things in!!!

creativehealinggoddess said...

Yay Robyn I found you, (I don't know how i lost you in the first place>)

Nice pic and pics i agree with Kavindra...and as you are creative i say just do it. You are a creator and its only the beginning.

frustrated artist said...

I AM a frustrated artist and have been saying that for some time. I understand how you feel and have collections of my own, with the best intentions of getting to each of the projects or plans.

For my 50th I decided I would start working my way through the piles of stuff I had collected and either (1) do something with it or (2) give it to GoodWill or toss (in the case that my stuff was highly unlikely to be inspirational for anyone else).

Like Nike says..."Just do it!" You'll feel better...a little each day.

Genie Sea said...

There are no mistakes my friend. None.

You are a garden goddess, and trust me that is a source of creativity not many have. A true gift!

I love seeing glimpses of your space; and I adore the blue of your studio walls. Gorgeous. Peaceful. Juicy with inspiration :)

Dia said...

chuckling reading your post!! I wish I had some of that 'would feel guilty if I was off being creative while CLEAING needs to be done' make-up!! Cleaning, what cleaning??
Love your cozy creation & meditation & essence space - relaxing just looking at it!
I also have piles & bundles of 'stuff' that I mean to do something with (or decided to get after a class or book, or_)
working on a run of valentines for the exchange Mother Henna is org; & really, truely did wash out my fridge door shelves & stove top today!!

As Kavindra says - yea on making some messy, disgusting stuff with those lovely art supplies!!

Tee hee - balance, right? I'll send you some of my 'what housework?' & you'll send me some of your beautiful organization!

love gardening, too. did get some arugula & radish seeds today :)

Anonymous said...

I know what you mean. I've got a lot of ideas and plans too, but my fuze doesn't work too ; )
I love your room !!!!!

BelleEnchanted said...

I think your home and your garden are such great creative outlets - and your art is too. I've found that "mistakes" in art often produce such beautiful results, stuff I couldn't have created if I had actually tried to do it exactly!

Serena said...

You have certainly created a beautiful haven for yourself, Robyn. I too, lose ideas if I don't get them written down soon enough. lol Take comfort from the fact that a lot of artists feel daunted by a blank page or canvas. just take that first step...pick up a brush and randomly dab the paint on in whatever colour you feel drawn to at the time. it doesn't have to be a masterpiece....the key is that you enjoy the process.

love, light and peace,

kim said...

To me your words and your gardens (and the photos of said gardens) are your ART. The extra stuff you do, like the piece you sent me are just extra from an already creative individual.