Tuesday, September 22, 2009

not thank God it is Friday.. but thank God it is the end of week 5 - a week of silly questions

once again for me, The Artists Way is coming back to faith, trust and belief in a God/Goddess/Creator.. call it what you will.. I just don't believe that prayers are answered.. coming from a family constantly telling me to get up off my knees, because God never did us any favours.. God helps those who help themselves.. but when I do pray (and that is not very often) I utter the words, hold my breath, not really expecting them to be answered and if they are.. I tell my self it is just fate..
I find it very difficult to believe in the Worlds abundance is there for everyone, when I look at the world, the poor and the starving - do they not pray?? and then when I do pray and ask for 'things' I feel guilty because there are thousands, millions, alot less fortunate than I am.. so I tell myself I must be happy with my lot

am I not getting something here in the book???

I really, really struggle with this belief in Spirit, it is a real struggle for me.. has been all my life.. like I am not quite 'game' to fully trust that there is something bigger than me.. just incase there isn't and I am let down again.

I just don't' get where any of the exercises are taking me... they don't make a whole lot of sense.. like what would I do if it weren't too selfish? go live in an ashram?? or what would I try if it weren't too crazy?? what the hell kind of question is that? what is crazy? jumping of a bridge?.. just do not get where this is going.. week 5 *sigh* all that I seemed to do was write loads of rubbish.

5 comments:

Teresa Lynne said...

I think that people have a misconception of what *Prayer* is really all about.

Then again I am no expert on religion or anything of the kind.

I think that WE all believe whether it be a higher power or whatever others want to call it/him or her.

I think that we all have Faith of some kind..if we didn't we wouldn't be here reading this book and sharing our journeys together.

I think that the Poor prays,but the poor is another misconception as many homeless people are known to have some form of mental illness of some sort.

I think that no matter how much we pray, we have to DO something about it, we have to MAKE that change and prayer gives us the strength to do it.

I could go on and on! Loved your post!

Meredith said...

I don't understand it, either, Robyn. I really don't. I work in the criminal justice system, and over and over I see that it's not black and white like the detective novels -- people mess up, yes, and then fall below the threadbare safety net in our society. Many of these people are mentally ill, yes (I'm guessing at about a third, easily) -- many of them just had the misfortune to be poor. And I know from reading Julia's memoirs that she has had plenty of money to pursue her dreams, so the mulish, stubborn part of me wants to put out its bottom lip and say "hogwash" right about now.

But... I know from a few years now of trying affirmations and creative visualization that sometimes it works. And it certainly feels better to have faith -- I just cannot always do it. And it doesn't feel better when things go "wrong" and it feels like you've been a fool.

As Anne Sexton put it: "Need is not quite belief."

I'm going more for the Buddhist approach of non-judgment. I usually can't tell based on present circumstances what is "good" or "bad" in my life. It's all just part of the path.

(I too am glad to be moving on from this chapter. Lots of waves of resistance.)

With a big hug for you,
Meredith

gemma said...

Resistance to those questions could be something your inner critic wants to censor....but what do I know? I skipped a bunch of them. Still lovin TAW though.

Serena said...

one thing i have learned from the abraham-hicks teachings is that the more we focus on negatives, we are actually adding more of the same. what we resist, persists. it took me a while to agree with that concept but i am finally getting it.

Judit said...

Wow, did we read the same chapter? Isn't it beautiful that we see the same text and get such difference reaction to that?
I loved week 5 in 2000. The wealth of possibilities... Maybe I just like to day-dream but for me all those questions give the opportunity to let my imagination run wild.
Those sentences give me hope and a library of possibilities. On the other hand I dont think about right away if my ideas are actually realistic in real life. Let's not kill he fun.
I love to dream. I love my imagination. In this respect in share the perspective of Einstien:
"Imagination is more important than knowledge."