Friday, November 7, 2008

day 6 ~ an odd sort of day


Denise described me to a T. I am absolutely full of internal clutter - thinking(constantly), analyzing(constantly), rationalizing; plus chastising and berating myself(constantly). Most times I don't realize I am doing it because I have been doing it for so long. My mind runs away for ages before I notice I am doing this to myself.

I had a very odd day today - I woke with all good intentions. Then I decided that maybe I could clean out my stored emails & clean up my yahoo chat list... Daisy is still on there and I have many of her emails from when I first met her... so I emailed Gemma & asked her to hold my hand in support, as I thought that it may be time for me to 'let Daisy go' .. then went to visit Cats in the Kitchen.... not a good idea. I cried and sobbed as I read her story, when I realized that I will never get to meet her in this life.. so it is definately still not time for me to let her go fully....(funny thing is, that this weekend would have been her birthday... synchronicity??)

it has been a harrowing day with one thing and another & all I could do today was utter the affirmation. But that's ok.


(for those of you who are wondering who Daisy is, you can read about her here: Daisy's blog)

16 comments:

Genie Sea said...

Oh my dear. I send you a blanket of hugs. Your post moved me deeply. I send you love, and light, and magic! You are a beautiful person! :)

Jamie said...

Your tears are a letting go, Robyn. Something is releasing. Sending you hugs and love as you go through this,

Jamie

Gemma said...

Robyn,
Lets have a birthday celebration for Daisy. Maybe you could sing Happy Birthday to her.I'll make tea and light some incense. We could have treats.
Sending Love to you
my ancient tribal sister.

xx

Sacred Suzie said...

Take about powerful clutter! So deep, emotional and full of sadness and love. Those emails aren't her. She is watching over you and close in spirit. We are all holding your hand Robyn.

todayandeveryday said...

Letting go of those emails is NOT letting go of Daisy. Instead, when you release the emails you release the resistance to what is. The energy of those we love is around us and IN us no matter if they are still in this material world or have moved on in their journey. You are so brave and I wish you peace in your heart and in your head with this. Much love!!
~Dawn

Kavindra said...

That's very hard. I'll be thinking of you all day dearest R.

originalbliss said...

Don't try to rush through your grief. It is a powerful mysterious teacher. In those times when the grief grabs hold of you and squeezes remember Daisy is just on the other side of a veil but still right there.

Spirit is eternal.
Many blessings to you!
Shannan

meandmom said...

One day at a time. Big hugs to you.

Tracy said...

{{hugs}} to you, Robyn!

Serena said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Serena said...

(((Robyn))), you are obviously a beautiful, caring and compassionate person. i can only imagine how difficult yesterday was for you but know that clearing out Daisy's emails was not discarding the special place you hold for her in your heart. may today (Saturday) be a magical day for you.

love, light and peace.

creativehealinggoddess said...

Just sending simple support.....

pen* said...

be gentle with yourself. baby steps. sending you lots of love.

Sherrie St. Cyr said...

You are in my thoughts and prayers - powerful releasing going on for you.

Leah said...

sending you hugs and love and healing vibes!!

Allison said...

What courage you have inside of you!