Monday, November 3, 2008

day two already!

I woke early this morning to the movement of the butterflies hanging over my bed, fluttering in the breeze that was created by my movements in bed.. immediately they reminded me of Daisy.(she sent them to me just before she died)

I wondered why it is so easy for me to believe that AIR exists, even though I can't see it. And why I find it so difficult to believe in Spirit, the ancestors and all the other guidance and help from beyond - all those spiritual things I can't see either, I constantly question. I never question air or wind, I just accept that they are there, that they exist. why is that? what is the difference?

while I was doing my morning blessings and my breathing, the wind came up and blew strongly outside the door, through the maple tree, rocking the branches. I noticed the iron candle holder that hangs in the tree, swaying in the breeze. I could not see the wind but here again was an example in believing in something that I cannot see.. a lovely gentle reminder from God: - to trust in those things that I cannot see.

I also realized that I breathe quite shallowly, not letting my belly relax, something I must work on. Later on in the day, the wind was gusting and the sheets were flapping in the breeze like over sized flags... it is amazing how windy it has been since Beltane.. and the beginning of my Soul Coaching journey. The air fluctuates between warm to quite cold.. Springtime in the mountains!

I actually struggled with today's task.. what kind of thing could i choose as a commitment to myself? The list was full of things I do anyway and I wanted to push myself, get out of my comfort zone.. so I thought for awhile and then it came to me like a huge prod.
SING!! YES, that will help me breathe and also help me get past feeling silly ..
so I made a commitment to sing to one song each day and it must be a gutsy, loud song. Today, I chose 'Ring of Fire' and sang along with The Man in Black
plus I also promised myself that the computer will go off at 9pm every night. that will be difficult !!

honouring my commitment to myself and others:
what are my commitments to myself, besides the new one I made today??
to be kind to myself, to be gentle with myself...
what were the commitments that I made to my SELF before I came here to live this life on Earth??
and what about commitments to others?? something I struggle with sometimes - take for instance, saying i will do something for someone, or taking on a job at a charity function or on a committee or even saying yes to a day spa with a friend, then realizing that I just cannot do it; physically, mentally or emotionally. Then having to say how I feel, stating my truth. I am honouring a commitment to myself (not to do something i don't want to do) but I am also not honouring a commitment that I made to some one else - letting someone down......


not even sure if I explained it very well here.. I guess it is all about balance.

I actually started to clear my verandah this afternoon too - something that I have been putting off for months, hanging more prayer flags up to blow in the wind seemed like the perfect thing to do for AIR week. Off to yoga tonight, I must take note of how I go with my breathing.......

14 comments:

Tracy said...

I love to sing & I don't do it near often enough. But yesterday I sang!

I also made a commitment to be kind & gentle to myself.

It's so funny because I'm not even doing the Soul-Coaching book study, but I can relate/am doing similiar exercises that the SC participants are doing with me having never read the book!! :)

Sacred Suzie said...

Such a beautiful post Robyn! There are symbols of air all around you and I absolutely adore the idea of singing as a form of honouring air and the breath inside us. I will try and breathe deep and perhaps sing a little too. Thanks for the inspiration Robyn, as usual you are such a beacon of light to those around you.

Gemma said...

"Ring of Fire"
OOOOh thats a good one.
:-)
Singing is an awesome commitment Robyn.
Yay!

freelittlebird said...

What a wonderful original commitment, to sing every day! Would love to see a picture of your prayer flags when you get them up.

Fatma said...

Love your posting. I so enjoy the different ways people are commiting to live a fuller life.

I love singing. Making a commitment to sing everyday sounds like so much fun.

pen* said...

i love how you are really connecting with the element of air this week and you describe it beautifully.

Kelly said...

I love your commitment to singing everyday!! How joyful for your spirit that will be...can't wait to hear what you choose to sing tomorrow....

Serena said...

What a clever way to honour your daily commitment, Robyn! You seem to be a very aware person which I think is absolutely wonderful. I enjoy reading your daily writings.

smilnsigh said...

Before you said Daisy, I thought that. Honest, I did. And I never knew her.

May I report that today, I too spent time, looking inside. I was quite proud of myself, if that fits. :-) I haven't done this particular pondering in a long time. In too long.

Thank you Dear, for inspiring me.

You are doing much more than I. But I'm still heartened by doing even a bit. And I truly say Thank You!

And on the issue of... what do I have to do, for others? And what do I have the right to do, for myself? I've seen that covered. And the bottom line was... Never jump at saying I will do this or that. Always give myself time to know whether it is good for me, first. What good does it do 'the other,' to say we will do something, which will drain us? We won't put our whole self into it. We will feel depressed, doing it. Etc. Etc.

Not the be all and end all, of an answer to that question, I know. The older I get, the more I tend to the rather cold/clear/strong approach to such things. And it doesn't always fit, with the usual social mores. :-)

But, I thought I'd say it. :-) Just adding my 2 cents worth, as they say. :-)

Many gentle hugs, on your journey...

Miss Mari-Nanci

Genie Sea said...

Ah, singing! I remember a time that I sang without self-consciousness before music teachers put doubt in my head, before American Idol, before singing was a competitive sport. I love this commitment to yourself. It's gorgeous!

Winterwood said...

I totally understand the commitment sthing perfectly - same here!

Danette said...

Aw Yeah! Singing, that's a fun commitment! Musical breathing.

I think I know what you meant there towards the end about over-committing. I like how Denise Linn reminds us that saying a loving "no" to others is actually saying "yes" to honouring our own path.

I think you are inspiring many of us to sing...

Allison said...

Air & faith/trust, what a beautiful connection you've made.

Turtleheart said...

Your post is so inspiring. So many different ways you are connecting with air, even though you say you struggle with what you cannot see. I love the commitment to sing! What a fun way to honor air and yourself.